Munich

We spent some days in Munich, visiting a friend. We were not much of tourists but to enjoy Spielplatz und Biergarten, we were good.Life in Germany is something I’m almost longing to. Well, not yet, Z have to be older (the possibility to get work and life balance with small children is better in Sweden) but I like the way you can live on the country side but close to a big city somehow.To move to another country now would be a big step for us, we are way too comfortable with our life in Sweden but I’d like to enjoy shorter winter and more mountains (south Germany in this case) and simplicity in big cities.Let’s see what life will offer us!

Find the jaguar in your orchid

We have few flowers at home. At least, we have some plants which resist some weeks without water. And we have an orchid. We got it as a gift some years ago and it was full with flowers but then, nothing. I mean, I’m not too interested of them, so I let it survive in a window and wait.

But this lovely got now 5 flowers. Last instinct to send sos to the world maybe?

I took my camera and did some photos and I discovered that there is a little jaguar in every flower. Maybe it’s a good metaphor for life? You have to be kind and lovely on the outside but keep your power inside, ready to go out?

PMS monster

It’s getting very obvious. I’m changed since I gave birth to my daughter. In many good ways, but there is one I can’t control. The PMS monster living in me is waking up once a month and taking over my whole personality. I get both very angry and very sad in the same day, observing myself from the outside and not understanding what’s happening. I loose totally control over myself and become an awful people to get around.

This is so strong and something I can’t handle. These PMS days, I would like to be at home and meet no one but at the same time, I need loving people around me, comforting me.

I hate this state because I’m not feeling myself. I use to wake up, not understanding why I’m already upset, while it happened nothing at all. I cannot work normally because I can’t get off this state of mind and I get very unpleasant as soon as I got some contradictions to deal with (which happens all the time). I feel like a bad colleague. At home, I get angry, impatient and no one knows how to get around with me. I feel like a very bad wife and mother.

On the outside, I’m like before, but on the inside, the monster is eating me up once a month.

If you ask me, the world will be gender neutral when women with hormones and cycles perturbations will be able to just do what the f*** they want during these aweful times without giving any explanation.

2 years

Our little girl is turning 2 years today. So much happened! Last year,she was walking for her first birthday and this year, she talks. What will she do next year?

The day she was born, it was cold (-19) and very sunny. Today, it’s grey and very slippery. Z got a keyboard and we enjoy being at home the 3 of us.

Let’s learn and create

This wa sa strange day today. Z is sick since yesterday evening, meaning a bad night for everyone. I woke up pretty “translated” this morning and much more tired than every day this vacation. Bad karma when work begins again on monday…

Yesterday, I finished to knitt a pullover for me and it was the first time I made this kind, I’ll tell in another post later. Anyway, I don’t have any knitting project for the moment, and I feel pretty bored while watching TV then. I like to make something with my hands when I watch something. So I decided to sort things out in my little hobby place. And then, magic happened! I cleaned my desk!

So now, no excuses anymore, I’ve got a proper place to learn and create. I’ve got some goals for spring, related to work but which will need some attention from me on the evenings and I want to write, draw, design and of course have this blog a little bit more updated. So now, I’m ready! 2019 can only be full of inspiration and new thoughts!

My 2018

A new year began and it’s very popular to write some resumé of the passed year. I think I’ve written some reviews almost every year… I found these one in the archives: 2008 , 2011, 2012, 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017 .

This year 2018 passed by pretty quickly. It was a good year, when we still enjoyed being at home full time (we shared M & I exactly alike) until Z began preschool in february. After that, we were alternatively at home with her on wednesday and it was a good idea. For her: she was only 1 year when she began and needed the rest in the middle of the week. For us: it is an incredible luxury not to work in the middle of the week. If someone is wondering about taking a day off, take it on wednesday! Monday and Friday just puts you in a longer week end and if you partner is working theses days, you won’t do other than being an “housewife”. On wednesday, it’s all benefit! You habe 2 fridays in the week and get some energy together for the two last days of the weeks. It was wonderful for us.

2018 was also the year when M stopped to comute to Stockholm and got a job in Uppsala where we live, in a company giving him the opportunity to do new and interesting things. This changed our lifes: 3 hours more every day for him to do other things than sitting in a train or a metro. For me and Z it meant much more quality time with each of our triade. Wonderful!

I had a rough automn at work, putting some of my plans on the blog on hold because I had to much to think about with work. This polluted a bit my life, but 2019 will be different, for reasons I won’t talk about, and you know why? Because this blog is not about work, it’s all about dreams, inspiration and creation!

I began a good habbit 2018: I went swimming once a week with a friend and it was good for my body and for my soul! I hope this friend want to make it 2019 on and on!

Broken dream or an occasion to start over?

We are actually taking a break from our normal life by visiting my parents for Xmas in France. This is good to cut the normal routine, even if our soon to be two years old is very challenging exactly because of that… Rules you know are not made to be broken when you have a little brain forming itself, at least not for the peace of the parents.

Anyway, we’ll survive!

This automne has been very challenging for me at work on a special level. Many times, I thought I would give up but somehow, I grew stronger from it. I never really found any point in learning from mistakes. I always thought (and do it even more now) that it’s a mental way to find some “good excuse” to survive the challenge we have to face right now. To be honest, I would rather have read a good book about what happened to me than go through it myself as I did. Anyhow, I took advantage of unexpected occasion to take a new path. Not radically new, but though, a little. By it, I don’t need to have any wishes for 2019. So no promise to break either hihi

Grey and focus

This period of the year in Sweden is like you feel that the world will go down, every day.

It’s grey, rainy and the light period during the day is short. Two weeks to the coming vacation and every cell in my body want it. We have been sick on and off (always one of us 3) and the every day Life is challenging.

But! Better to focus on the little well defined goals that I decided before I wanted to work toward. Just focus.

Evolve or you will disappear

Life happens. All the time. Both funny, interesting and even hard. Somehow, when I become older, I get also more negative for changes and things that put my plans upside down. But I got this reminder this morning when I left Z at school. This dinosaur was freezing its ass outside by minus 7 degrees Celsius and for real, he would have disappear if it wasn’t because it was a plastic toy. I have to evolve, every day, in order to get more efficient and keep my laughs. Negativity kills everything good and changes actually make it different and funnier if you see the challenges and grow from them.

Wednesday at home with Z

I’m enjoying the last days of parental leave, which come once a week, in the middle of a hectic job. We had to defreeze our freezer (I thought new ones did not need it but yes…) So I’ve been pretty creative on the food area recently to use everything we had in the freezer. The least obvious things were the fruits. I’ve been making marmelade a couple of evenings this week and actually, I’m happy: we got a lot now to enjoy on the Saturday and Sunday breakfasts!