Saturday. I slept long and ok but woke up in the middle of the night and I felt irritated. I still am and cannot put in on anything. Arguing for nothingn with M, he is brave to support my PMS mood. I feel like the only place I would like to be right now is in a wood, with M and no one pushing on me their expectations about everything. I can’t even count the numbers of comments I received since people know that we are engaged. I mean: self mutilation since I wrote it on social media (and since I actually talk to my online contacts in my IRL life) but oh dear! How do people do to have so much energy to give for other things than their own? I can’t. Not today. And I can’t succeed to be nice when people ask me about our plans. But again MY bad. I will know better next time!
Anyway. We are right now at the Fotografiska, a museum of phography in Stockholm and we are waiting for some friends to eat brunch together. There is millions of visitors and I just stand to sit in a corner up, close to the toilets. This woman is looking at me and with her determination, tells me to get myself together and be a nice company. Not a 34 years old angry woman who doesn’t know why she feels so.