When I woke up this morning, I felt happy. It was the last Monday to go up to go to work before the summer Holliday. I cannot totally complain either, I just came back from a long weekend in France when I visited my sister, her newborn son and her boyfriend.
I noticed two things during this weekend end. The first thing is how much I need to deconnect from work for a little while. I needed to be in a very different environment to stop thinking of work in the background. I like my job, but I really need a little break. This part time working is very enjoyable, I love the days with Z (except the ones when the only sound she gets out of her mouth is “no”) and she definitely needs the stop on Wednesdays to make it through the week at school. But I also always have this feeling not being enough at work. It also has to do with the fact that people around me have also a lots to do as well, so it’s kind of a shared bad consciousness around all the time. I need to get off that for a long time.
The second thing I notice is how much I love my family. My “original” one (parents and sister) and even the one M and I built. I was thinking of them the whole time, my lovely M and my sweet Z. I was longing to them, wondering what they were doing. At the same time I enjoyed to spend time with my sister and to discover my nephew (so much poo out of a so little body!! I forgot this!) I also wanted home to M and Z. Which happened after two days.
This morning, I woke up happy also because I knew I would spend some time with my girl before the school. She is usually lovely in the mornings and so she was today. She was drinking her milk and dancing to some songs at the same time.
So we got prepared and we took our bike & chariot to the preschool. When we arrived at the second intersection from home, the police was blocking the streets. I couldn’t help and looked in the blocked area and saw the shape of a body under a sheet. I didn’t stop of course but I couldn’t help to see this. I did bike quickly to preschool, thankful that Z cannot understand what we just passed by.
This is the second dead body I see in a public area in Uppsala since we moved here. The first time was a girl who wanted to shortcut to go to the train and got killed by a passing freight train. This time, the police haven’t revealed what happened to this woman but they have suspicion of murder. The statistics in Sweden shows 2016 that 40% of the violence made to women is caused by a relative. Sadly, she may have died because of one of her closest people.
This put me in a strange mood today. And even more thankful of what I’ve got to go back home to: a wonderful husband and a little girl who needs to learn how to let only nice people come into her private and unprotected sphere.
Take care of the love you deserve.