balance between honesty and lie

i made a cruel experience the pasts days. I had a “secret” and then a choice: being honest and rely on a solid friendship or being a liar and destruct a solid friendship. I thought “shit easy! lest’s be honest!” and now, i know that it ended in “destruct a solid friendship”. Well, solid, it may not have been that solid when i think of it now. At least not as solid as i thought.

hurting people is never a cool thing but even when i am screaming that it was an involontary mistake, it doesn’t help. And i feel angry. Angry at everyone that tells that you live and you learn. I am really wondering which price i am currently paying. What did i do to mess it up like that? I really don’t see what i could have done better in this special situation and well, next time, there will be no next time, like at 2’18 in eminems song.